10 Ways Being a Parent is like Being on Survivor

Except, you know, harder.

  1. Everything is dirty all the time.
giphy (68).gif
giphy.com

Everything. All the time.

2. You’re involved in lots of physical challenges

giphy (63).gif
giphy.com

Excuse me, how do people get a 25-pound toddler into shoes he doesn’t want to wear?!

3. There are days you definitely want to vote people off the island

giphy (64).gif
giphy.com

If you tell me the dinner that I slaved over for two hours because you requested it is yucky one more time, I’m snuffing your torch, kid.

4. Someone’s always naked

giphy (62).gif
giphy.com

Where did your diaper go? And how did you take it off in the first place?!

5. When you get hungry and tired, you snap at those closest to you

giphy (65).gif
giphy.com

Either I hate everyone in this house, or I need a hamburger. Not sure.

6. But then you apologize, because you really do love them

giphy (66).gif
giphy.com

Love you. Mean it.

 

7. There are no secrets in your house

giphy (58).gif
giphy.com

Oh my gosh, kid, did you really just tell the cashier how much I weigh?

8. You keep trying, even though some days you get absolutely nowhere

giphy (59).gif
giphy.com

It took me literally two months to think to move the granola bars to a higher cabinet in the kitchen. Two months of the baby dumping them all onto the floor five times a day.

I have two master’s degrees. That’s how tired having kids makes you.

9. Your life is full of so much dirt that you barely notice it anymore

giphy (61).gif
giphy.com

Ah, it’s only nineteen pounds of beach sand. It’ll sweep up.

10. Jeff Probst is right – it truly is the adventure of a lifetime

giphy (67).gif
giphy.com

Hold on to your hats, friends. It’s gonna be one heckuva ride.


3 thoughts on “10 Ways Being a Parent is like Being on Survivor

  1. This is amazing! The granola bar thing sums up life so well. I’ll qualify the not noticing the dirt though- you don’t notice it, UNTIL you are about to have company. Then it becomes all too noticeable…

    Like

Leave a comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.